Saturday, May 30, 2015
Diabetes and Body Image
The last few months I have been struggling with the way I look. I look in the mirror and mourn for the old days. The days when I could eat what I wanted and not think twice about it. But that's no longer the case and my body has completely turned on me. I am sure that my weight gain has been a mix of things, getting older, slower metabolism, not being as active, and I still blame a small part on my diabetes, but I think that's more of a cop out. I jumped on the lose weight band wagon after the new year, but struggled and saw only small changes that didn't make it worth it. It's been extremely difficult and I am constantly frustrated by it.
I like my curves and I want them to still be around, but I would like to shrink my thighs and belly back down to what they used to be. I would love to be able to look in the mirror again and be confident in how I'm shaped or even feel confident about posting a photo of myself where you can see my full body. I don't want to look like the women in magazines or on TV. I DO want to look and feel healthy again.
Thankfully, a few friends of mine decided we were going to get back in shape. Some of my friends gave up sugar, others went back to their wedding diets, and I decided to make healthier choices. I downloaded the My Fitness Pal app and have been tracking everything, what I'm eating, my workouts, how many steps I'm taking, I mean it, E-V-E-R-Y-T-H-I-N-G.
It's too early to see any differences, but I have seen a huge difference in my blood sugars. I haven't had any huge spikes in my sugars or very many lows. It's actually keeping me motivated right now. One of the hardest things about dieting for me is not seeing the outcome right away, but at least I can see a small light at the end of the tunnel with my numbers being in great control.
We are constantly bombarded with images of photoshopped women that make us feel less than we really are. And when we don't look like them it's easy to just want to give up. Who would have thought that my diabetes would be the thing to keep me going. What's yours?